Phil Richards MBE- Kidney Cancer

The lessons I learned from the teacher I never wanted

MY Kidney Cancer storyPhil Richards MBE | July 2025

Phil Richards MBE | July 2025

Firstly, thank you for taking the time to read my story and I hope that you can take something of value from it.

If I could set the scene, I was a 39-year-old man, with a lovely wife and 2 incredible teenage daughters that formed a tight knit family unit.  I had a successful career, I exercised 3 to 4 times a week and I looked and felt happy and healthy.  If I was to go back to my younger self and show him the life he was going to have, I’m sure he would have been delighted, why wouldn’t he be?  My life however was reframed on the 19th March 2017, by an unexpected, unplanned life event that shouldn’t happen to anyone, let alone a 39-year-old man.  With no obvious warning signs, I started passing blood in my urine and gradually became crippled by stomach and back pain, all within a 12-hour period.  This wasn’t something I could ignore, even if I wanted to.  I would liken the realisation to the engine management light flashing up on your car, and this needed urgent attention.  Of course, the first thing we do in emergency situations is consult with our good friend Google and I was able to self-diagnose myself with kidney stones.  We all know that Dr Google is never wrong, right?  To get a second opinion, my wife urged me to go to A&E, so doubled up in pain, that’s where I went.  That Saturday night in A&E turned into a memory that will never leave my mind.  After numerous tests including bloods and CT scans, the doctor came in to see me with the results.  He then proceeded to deliver the news that nobody ever wants to hear.  “Mr. Richards, we’ve found an 11cm tumour on your right kidney.  I’m so sorry!   At that precise moment, time just stood completely still.  Don’t even ask me what was going through my mind, I couldn’t tell you, I just felt empty, and I felt lost.  What transpired was that it wasn’t just an 11cm tumour, it was a stage 3 cancer diagnosis that has no cure.  In devastating situations like this, you enter what I call forced acceptance.  There was no Back to the Future flux capacitor to turn back time and accepting what’s happened was my only option.  In the days that passed as my mind attempted to process the news, I soon discovered that the cancer diagnosis wasn’t the hardest task I’d have to face.   How do I now tell my wife that the future she’d dreamed of had now changed?  How do I tell my teenage girls that the man in their life that promised to never leave them …… I’m sure using your own imagination you can fill in the blanks.

The next few weeks were a blur!  Having my right kidney removed and focusing on my recovery was the easy part.  What nobody teaches you is how to cope with a life changing disease.  The fear of metastatic reoccurrence was always at the forefront of my mind, and I spent months of looking in the bathroom mirror telling myself I was going to die.  I’m naturally an optimist with a positive outlook on life and I wanted to flip the script in my mind.  One day I looked into the same bathroom mirror and told myself I wasn’t going to die today, not today, not this week and not this year.  I made a commitment to stop the negative self-talk and start taking positive actions.  My disease was being managed through observation; CT scans every 3 months moving to 6 monthly.  There definitely is such a thing as Scanxiety, when it came to results day.  To be fair, I never worried about the results day as I was pumped full of adrenaline.  It was always the day after that I had an incredibly low day, almost like that feeling as a child on Christmas Day when all your presents had been opened and there was nothing left to look forward to.  It didn’t matter if the results were good or bad I still felt low.  It took me a few cycles to become aware of my feelings, and to prepare myself to manage the situation I would always clear my diary on that day, giving me some alone time to reflect.

In December 2018 my fear became reality, metastatic spread into my lungs! I won’t lie, this was an emotional setback for me, my family and friends but also one that had to be faced into.  There were some options of treatment at this time, but there were also clinical trials in progress with the potential to have more impact in prolonging life.  I made the decision that I was going to decline the offer of treatment and focus on the parts of life that only I could control.  My mindset was that if I could be laser focused on nutrition, exercise and sleep, I had the chance of slowing down my cancer until more treatments with better successful outcomes were available. This by far has turned out to be one of my best decisions in life.  Not only did I slow the cancer progression down, but I also felt energetic with a real zest for life.  Making memories with family and friends became a priority, and at work I was performing at the top of my game.  My health became my most valuable asset, and working on the elements inside my control helped me cope with those outside of my control.

Being diagnosed with Kidney cancer was by far the saddest moment in my life, but the truth is that I needed cancer so that I could find myself.  I invested time finding my purpose in life and as a result I know what that it is now – It’s to help others!  Working with charities like Scannappeal (who provide lifesaving equipment for the NHS) really helps me to gain a sense of fulfilment, and that wouldn’t have happened without my diagnosis.

 To date, I have been awarded an MBE for services to charity and the economy, I’ve spoken at Downing Street on how charity work enhances the NHS, and I’ve met some incredible people all whilst creating fabulous memories.  I’m not saying that you need a cancer diagnosis to win at life, far from it, but for me it was an example of how trauma can lead to triumph.  As we approach the later months of 2025, my disease has progressed, but the treatment options are far more advanced now than they were 8 years ago.  In February 2024, I began a combination treatment of targeted and immunotherapy (Avelumab and Axitinib), which gives me hope to keep living the life I enjoy.  As it stands after over a year of treatment, my response is not as I’d hoped showing no real evidence of benefit.  But I knew right from the outset that I was facing a disease that was incurable, so I changed three of those letters to become incredible. That has become the mantra of my life, and although it isn’t always easy, it is always a choice I’m determined to make.

I’d like to thank you for taking the time to read my story, and through my life lessons I’d like to share some final points:

If you are currently living with cancer:

1. Winning at life isn’t measured in years, it’s measured in how you show up today.  We all have a choice to wake up with a smile or a frown, but when you make the right choice, that’s when great things start to happen. Remember that you are the CEO of your own life.
2. Take control of your diagnosis in the same way as you do with your finances.  Don’t let anyone make decisions without it being the right thing for you. That includes treatment options. Quality of life over quantity of life wins every time.
3. If you would be prepared to die for your loved ones, put that same effort into living for them.  Control the controllable, eat well, sleep well and exercise regularly.

When you want to feel brave, but you are only qualified in fear:

1. Bravery is about getting to the start line but not always finishing the race.  Some people get the opportunity to ring that bell or hear the news that they have no evidence of disease – We should always be delighted for those people.  But if that isn’t you, it doesn’t mean you’ve lost, because real bravery is starting the race knowing that you will never finish.
2. Fear gives you the test first and the bravery lessons after.  There is no revision, multiple choice exam when cancer hits you, but when it feels all consuming, just remember this.  You don’t always need to feel brave in the moment to become brave overall.
3. Getting knocked down really hurts, but if you don’t lift yourself from the floor, you end up with a cold bum.  Bad days are a given, we all have them.  But the ability to correct your thinking puts you back in the game and in with a chance.

I wish you all the health and happiness you deserve.  Big love

Phil Richards MBE.

Scannappeal

Since we began in 1987, we have raised over £20m and funded equipment in every major department in the hospitals we support.

Scannappeal raises funds to purchase life-saving equipment for Amersham, Stoke Mandeville, Wycombe and Community Hospitals which serve people living in Buckinghamshire and neighbouring parts of Berkshire, Bedfordshire, Hertfordshire, Middlesex and Oxfordshire.