Posted by July 2000 Lanzarote Spain
The first time I met Ian was in Lanzarote whiles I was on holidays with my parents and family. At the time Ian was a co owner of a bar called Nancy Spain’s A live music bar in the night club area. I returned the following night and we went out after he finished work – that was 24 years ago. The people that were employed by Ian in that little Bar remained close friends and still are to this day. Ian wrote an article about one of these guys Terry Green in 2022 – they were close friends – Terry was a manager in the bar and his official interview was 9/11/01 They had known each other for years before this and the formality was more about contracts of employment than an actual job interview. I had turned on the TVs in the bar as the lads chatted outside and watched the news flash of the dreaded twin tower attack. Ian kept the bar open all day as we had a lot of tourist on the island that September and the general feeling in the bar with tourist was that they were concerned about their flights home and danger of further attacks. But the bar suffered for some time after the Twin Towers, tourism had dropped and the bar luckily had a substantial local following which kept the business alive. This article is about living with cancer and I just wanted to show how and where we met. 24 years ago and to be fair he has not changed too much, in some ways more matured. Physically back then Ian was in great shape, he worked hard and played hard. His life did centre around the business which kept him in shape along with the excellent diet and daily swims.. yes it was Lanzarote with 10 months good weather. Ian had a charming manner that really worked well behind the bar, by nature he is a complete flirt and this took time to get used to, but I am also quiet a flirt so it was definitely a great match.
We split for a couple of years but got back together in 2004. We attended Ian’s sisters wedding in August 2004 and this event changed our lives, in November 2004 he proposed and we got engaged that Christmas. Ian’s Mum became a close friend of mine and every visit to her included a girls day out. Ian and his business partner decided to sell Nancy Spain’s as his business partner needed him back in Ireland. So the bar was actually sold in 2003 and Ian returned to Ireland in Nov 2004. But the plans in Ireland were delayed and in January 2005 Ian rented an apartment in Cork. Ian had originally moved to Cork in 1990 and had established a depot for his business partner in the City, like all of Ian’s businesses this had flourished and in 1999 Ian presented a business propersition to his business partner for the purchase of a property in Lanzarote. The property required a substantial renovation and was initially purchased in August 1999 and completed in November 1999.
In November 2012 my Dad had a sudden fatal heart attack, my Mum & Dad had retired to France in 2010. We were on a Skype call talking to my Mum when it happened. Ian had to stay in Ireland but had managed to organise flights for me to France. It was one of the hardest flights I ever had and the taxi from the Airport to the house seemed endless.
From 2005 to 2014 Ian was involved in multiple projects for his business partner. These included the rebuilding of the Cork Depot, a pub in Darwin (North Manchester) and multiple projects in Portugal. Without the daily swimming and warm weather Ian gained weight, but he still had a very active life as he worked about 10 hours a day, basically his mobile never stopped until 2014.
Ian was established a new transport company in Cork in 2010, a month after we were involved in a serious car crash, we were in Dublin as I was flying back to Manchester to visit family, We were stopped a traffic lights when a car drove into the back of us at about 40mph. We ended up in hospital with spine injuries. I have little relocation of the crash as the impact had knocked me out, I came around when Ian was lifting me out of the passenger seat. Seriously this man is made of steel. He escaped the crash with light injuries to his back. However Ian was in Dublin for business as his business partner had asked him to redeveloped a bar he owned in County Dublin. The night of the crash we were in A&E when Ian took a call instructing him to open the business immediately in Cork and the next day he traveled back to Cork and commenced the closure of the original business and the opening of their new transport company that was May 2010.
I moved fully to Cork in July 2010 and shortly after that I commenced working for Ian’s company again on a 3 day week. Ian was saving hard to buy a house but prices even in 2010 were very high. This business really took off and it was amazing to see it build.
We went on our annual holiday in June 2013, no matter where Ian went his work came with him, his laptop and mobile were vital. It can be strange going on holidays with Ian, no matter where we go he seems to meet people he knows, seriously its weird, he picked a Villa in caleta de fuste Fuerteventura, a place neither of us had ever visited -the first night we were there we went to a live music bar for a few drinks, the singer on the stage took a break and came straight to our table going “Hi Ian hows it going ?” the following night we walked past a bar and the guy behind the bar staired at us, we kept walking only to hear a shout from behind us “Hey Ian are you comming in for a drink ?” it was the guy that staired at us and Ian knew him from when we lived in Lanzarote. Thats the kinda holiday we seem to have. The mobile never stopped and he would access the business software throughout the day, this holiday was cut short as a situation in Ireland needed his immediate hands on attention . So we flew home and within a few days he had resolved the problem with a promise that we would take a second holiday in October back to the sun, but this one was stranger than normal, we boarded the flight and I looked at Ian as he was extremely quiet, I asked what was up and he told me he had a feeling of Doom. Doom !! was not something I had ever seen or heard Ian come out with but there it was the first negative feeling I had seen from Ian in 10 years. The holiday was great but Ian seemed to be constantly on alert, most likely ready for whatever his sense of doom was about. We returned to Cork a week later, after a great and relaxing holiday but in November 2013 Ian was admitted to hospital for a trapped Kidney Stone, he had recurring kidney problems since 1992, and on the rare occasion a stone would trap in the ureter and need medical intervention. On average Ian gets about 20 stones a month in his kidneys and this continues even now. The procedure for removing a trapped stone is very painful. But having suffered from stones for so many years Ian can tolerate the pain and generally passes the stones without medical intervention. I asked Ian if this could have been the sense of Doom he had experienced on holidays and he said it was unlikely as his kidney issues were recurring.
I am writing this 10 years later so a lot of the initial impact of the medical diagnoses is gone but to say that I was worried would be an understatement.
My birthday is the 14th of February Valentines day, A day that Ian dedicates to spoiling me rotten. He planned to take the day off and therefore moved all meetings and business appointment up, this included business in Dublin which would take 48 hours. So he headed off to Dublin on the Monday 10th February and during one of his meetings a customer pointed out to Ian that the right side of his neck appeared to swell during the meeting. Ian went back to his Mums house where he stayed anytime he was in Dublin and checked the mirror and sure enough his neck was swollen Ian said if it was like that the next day he would call his doctor to check it out. The next day was again full of business meetings and later that evening he drove back home to Cork. The swelling was gone. We went to work the next day and about mid day I noticed his neck had swollen. The weather that week was extreme with heavy rain and high winds which in the transport industry meant that Ian was in constant contact with his drivers. But he decided that he could handle any situation off his mobile, so he called his doctor and made an appointment for the next day at 3pm. That was Wednesday 12th and the weather had got worse overnight but Ian left work at 2pm to travel for his appointment, the wind had gone from bad to worse with gail force winds of about 80klms an hour. On route to his Doctor the wind had caused a crash a truck have overturned a couple of miles ahead of him, this had caused a traffic jam that basically had brought traffic to a stand still, Ian called his doctor and was told that the doctor would not be able to see him later as her appointment schedule was completely booked so they rearranged appointments for the next day. The appointment was for 10am and Ian went straight from home to the clinic, I was home that day as I worked Mondays to Wednesday.
Ian Called me as soon as he left the clinic, basically his doctor was off sick and the replacement Doctor had examined him, Ian has badly impaired hearing and because of this he has a heightened sense of reading people. He told me that the doctor had looked at his neck and immediately left the room, she had called his hospital to make an appointment for an ultra sound. He wasn’t that concerned but did ask me to go with him just in case. He collected me and drove straight to work and Thursday were a day that he would do the payrole. His appointment in the hospital was at 4pm so he had plenty of time. We arrived at the hospital early and went straight to radiology, Ian was called in very fast, he came back out 20 minutes later and looked concerned. I asked what was up and he said the nurse doing the ultrasound looked frightened and had gone out to get the main consultant, again Ian’s ability to read peoples reactions was at its hight. Ian said that the radiologist looked really concerned and had asked him to wait in the waiting room, as he spoke we noticed a guy running down the hall, Ian told me that that was the radioologist but most likely the fact he was running had nothing to do with him, as he said this the radiologist glanced at Ian and said “Ian I am trying to get a surgeon before he goes into theater for you stay there and I will be back…. Talk about freights well this was the first of many to come. I looked at Ian and he had gone pale, I think he said “What the absolute Fuck is happening” the radiologist returned a few minutes later and told Ian to head home and that the consultant would call him later. So we went home, Ian was very quiet and deep in thought, about 30 minutes after we had our evening meal Ian’s mobile went. It was the hospital saying he was been admitted the next day at 8am and should bring an overnight bag. My birthday 14th of Feburary 2014 our first encounter with cancer began.
As Ian was told to expect to be kept overnight I dropped Ian to the hospital. As he entered the hospital the Lymphoma decided to attack. He just made it to the admittance area and told the person behind the desk that his right eye had no vision only a large black spot surrounded by multiple black floaters and his balance was off. They called an emergency admission instantly and Ian was taken to a private room. He had told me to leave as it could take hours to get any results but he would keep me updated all day. So I went off to do our weekly shopping and decided to head into the office on my way home. A nurse had met Ian to discuss the plan for the day and when she had completed the initial assessment along with a blood test and blood pressure the first consultant arrived into the room. He was an oncologist, who basically examined Ian and decided to add a deep eye X ray, a CT Scan and a brain MRI to the procedures. And like a flash everything commenced. He was rushed to a consultant Ophthalmologist who described his right eye as similar to the surface of the moon as against smooth like an egg but offered no explanation as the team were waiting for results from the blood test and the upcoming CT and MRI. Ian was then taken to radiology for a CT Scan. At that point they decided to do the biopsy to Ian’s neck. He met the surgeon and about an hour later he woke up in the recovery ward. He asked to call me with an update and as we were talking the surgical team entered the room and told Ian he was been moved to have the MRI.
Basically a couple of hours passed and he called me again. The oncologist had met Ian after the MRI and told Ian that he had “A form of Cancer called Lymphoma, but they could not conclude this till after the results of all the test from the day were back, which could take up to 3 weeks. The initial feeling was that his immune system was in a state of confusion and had attacked his right eye most likely preventing cancer cells that had got past his neck lymph nodes before they got to his brain. I nearly collapsed as this was not what we had expected. So my journey home was filled with the emotional impact of a cancer diagnoses, Ian had assured me that he felt he could beat this but would need Chemotherapy and further surgery. It was only 2pm and I decided to return to the hospital to see how he was doing. I entered his room and found him deep in conversation with a customer on his mobile, they were sorting out an issue with a delivery that had gone wrong. After the call we discussed all the test from the day and the discussion with the Oncologist. I had also spoken to the Ward Sister who had explained most of the available results and the likely treatment to follow. Ian had a number of other specialist in to see him and had met his future medical team. After visiting hours I headed home to try and untangle the amount of information and attempt to sleep.
Ian was discharged the next day but told that he needed further test over the next few weeks that included a PET Scan, a bone marrow biopsy and a lumber punch. He also had an appointment to meet his Cancer liaison nurse. He had also been down to the Chemotherapy ward to get accessed. His weight at that time was 94kgs, which I was a little surprised at as it seemed heavy for Ian
The pathway to staging his cancer…
The oncologist had told Ian that it was likely to be Stage 3A Hodgkins Lymphoma but they would know more after further test.
Almost a week had passed and Ian was still awaiting a call from the hospital to arrange the remaining test. He got a call from another Ophthalmologist who made a very fast appointment for Ian in a different hospital. We went to meet this gentleman the following day. Ian’s biggest fear was that the damage to his eye was not going to get sorted. The Ophthalmologist struggled to get liquid anesthetics into his eye’s, Ian has very sensitive eyes and even eye drops are a struggle for him. But he did complete the test and told Ian that he would call the oncologist to report his findings. At this point they felt that the eye issue was a separate medical issue to the lymphoma. Ian was called that evening by the Oncologist and asked to attend the hospital the next day for a bone marrow biopsy. I dropped Ian into the hospital and headed back to work. The oncologist met Ian and told him that they were trying to establish if the damage to his eye was caused by Lymphoma or a separate condition. The oncologist lifted his phone and called the Ophthalmologist and they agreed that it was a unique case but the eye was actually classed as part of the lymphoma attack. The oncologist then decided to do a Lumber Punch at the same time as the marrow biopsy. When I returned that afternoon Ian was confined to bed to recover from the procedures, he had to stay in the same position for nearly 5 hours to allow the bone that had been biopsied to settle back and heal. Ian said that the procedures were okay and not that painful. He was discharged the next day and had a date set to go for his first of many PET Scans a few days later.
He got a call the following day to discuss the scan prep. Basically he could not drive to this scan and was told he would be radioactive for most of the day. So again I dropped Ian to the Scan unit and headed off to a coffee shop to wait for the nurse to call me with a pickup time.
So that was all the test done and now we had to wait for the results. It took another week before Ian was called into a meeting with his cancer liaison nurse. We went in together and had a lengthy meeting with her. She explained that the PET Scan had confirmed that the lymphoma had light up his scan like a Christmas tree, we both asked various questions and discussed concerns, Ian surprised me by asking “ Should I get my affairs in order” to be told “Not yet”. It was then that I realized how serious Ian felt this was, I was under no illusion that it was dangerous but had not expected it to be terminal as that had not been mentioned up to now. Ian was given the date that he would commence Chemotherapy and as we left Ian said “ We need to get a lot of cleaning products for the house” so we went to the shops.
The sense of Doom Ian had felt on holidays in October had manifested itself to be Cancer. But once Ian was diagnosed that doom turned to a savage view to kill the Cancer, and he approached it with an attitude that felt like we were in a war zone. This was definitly a life or death fight, and for those that know Ian he is an absolute fighter.
Chemotherapy 2014
Ian was at a business meeting in Cork on Thursday the 13th of March 2014 when he got a call from the oncology unit asking where he was. We had been told that his first round of Chemotherapy was at 11am on Fifay the 14th but no one bothered to tell Ian that the date had been changed. He called me to tell me he was heading home to change. Ian was in a suit and tie for the meeting and did not want to go into a Chemo Ward dressed like that, he had purchased clothing specially for his chemo, baggy T shirts and combat jeans. We didn’t know what to expect as side effects for the aggressive level of chemo so Ian had planned to be prepared for anything. He got back to the house and done his superman change of clothing all ready to go to the hospital, he had packed an emergency overnight bag just incase. Straight to the hospital, when we got there Ian asked me not to come in, he wanted to face this part on his own, I know that when he decides on something it can be difficult to change his mind unless you produce enough reasons to prove him wrong, so I went off shopping and Ian went to the ward. About 3 hours later he called me to collect him, I was unsure what to expect, with our limited knowledge and only information that all felt negative on the internet we seriously expected that Ian would be ill, but there he was chatting to someone he knew with a smile on his face. I asked Ian who that was and he said “No idea, I think it was a nurse from the kidney ward that I met years ago” and then I asked how did that go “Not a problem, felt easy enough and I;m back in two weeks for more” – Not a fucking problem – seriously “I just had aggressive chemotherapy” and his answer was Not a problem. This was definitly not what I expected. So the first of 12 therapy’s done and 6 months to go. Ian had already taken his hair into consideration and has cut it very short it took another two therapies to result in complete hair loss. Very little changed over those 6 months, his temperment was iffy, but no sickness, yes there were complications during treatment but he seemed to be able to handle everthing they put him through. He keep our life as normal as possible. Ian does all the cooking at home, I think he fears me anywhere near the kitchen just incase I poision him. Would I ?!!!!! No Comment
On the point of “No Comment” when I commenced writing this artice Ian asked me not to say too much about his previous employee’s or business partner so I will not say much yet. Some of the noticable things that started happening around Ian, the constant calls to his mobile slowed, our so called friends disappeared as if we had a plague and strangly the weekly contact from employment agencies offering Ian various senior level jobs stopped. It felt like a switch going from constantly on to a sudden off. News that Ian had Stage 4 Cancer had spread like wildfire in Ireland, the transport industry is small enough that word of mouth scatters fast and grows heads, legs and tails. One of the things that really annoyed Ian was the way people approached him with the “I heard you were seriously ill, you look fine” To be fair Ian did look well, he had lost his hair but wore baseball caps a lot, he had lost weight but the chemotherapy steriods had caused bloating so weight loss was not obvious. Ian had on occassions answered the “Your not sick” lot with a typical “Fuck off have you Superman powers that you can scan inside my body” it really annoyed him but he got used to it. For any reader here please do not tell Cancer patients that they don’t look sick, try things like Your looking well or don’t comment at all.
Radiotheraphy 2014
Ian completed Chemotherapy in August 2014 but had to wait 100 days before the next scan, so he decided we needed a break and we took a two week holiday in September. Ian got the okay to fly from his oncologist and as he was still fully employed we could afford the break. A sun destination back to Fuerteventura – Ian’s hair started to grow back fast in the good weather and he got a lovely sun tan. We had no idea what the end results of the chemo were and decided not to even talk about it on holidays. Midway through the holiday we were on the beach – I was walking down to the water and heard Ian’s phone ringing, after my swim I walked back up and noticed that Ian looked angry so I asked him what was up, he lifted his mobile and turned it off, now this wasnt just unusual it was something that I never saw Ian doing, his mobile was always on 24/7, so I asked who had called and the answer was “it ws the I want and need lot” so I decided to push a little and discovered that his business partner had called and had told Ian he needed to get back to Cork now – like what the fuck! seriously Ian had just completed 6 months of aggressive chemotherapy and was on holidays trying to relax before a scan that would show either further therapy or remission and this guy calls him to return why? and I asked why?. The person Ian had trained to do the payroll had issues trying to complete the wage run, it was not that difficult as Ian had left all the necessary information for them. But he got up and said lets go back to the villa and have a drink, so off we went. He walked in opened his laptop and within 15 minutes had the payrole done, all that’s all it took. The mobile stayed off for a few days and when he switched it back on there were about 50 missed calls most of them were employee’s wanting to take days off and nothing in all those calls had any real importance. I though it would ruined the holiday but Ian sat back and looked at me and said “Ignore it you already know what were dealing with and I don’t forget or forgive easy” typical Ian.
The scan results
We were home about two weeks when Ian got the appointment for his 100 day Pet Scan. It was October 2014, the scan was done and we waited for the results. The Oncologist called Ian the following day and the news was iffy. It appeared that the Chemotherapy had not completely destroyed the Lymphoma, the Oncologist told Ian that he was considering the next treatment but wanted to discuss it with the national lymphoma board at their next online meeting the following Thursday but Ian pushed him for information and what treatment could face him. The oncologist mentioned radiotherapy as the possible next step and if so it would start within weeks, something new for Ian to start reading about. And yes a week later the oncologist called Ian again to tell him that a radiologist oncologist would be in contact with him to discuss the procedures. That call happened the next day and Ian went in for the initial meeting. 6 weeks of targeted radiotherapy but at the highest level of exposure. This commenced the following week. After the 6 weeks we met the radiologist oncologist his first words to Ian “That’s all we can do for you sorry but the results are not good, you need to get your affairs in order” Ian pushed for further clarification, this was 3 weeks before Christmas “Enjoy your Christmas dinner as you will be admitted into one of our wards by the New Year and we will ensure that you are as comfortable as possible” Ian quizzed this and the oncologist looked straight at me and said he has 6 to 8 weeks to live sorry and got up and walked out. Ian was calm and looked at the other medical team members and asked “What do you guys think ?” the room went very quiet but one of the lady doctors said that “It is most likely” we got up to leave, on the way out Ian looked at me and said “They are wrong, I will still beat this” I didn’t know wether to laugh or cry. But he proved them wrong, we had both our Christmas dinner and New Years dinner with Ian’s mum in Dublin, Ian actually cooked both dinners and he seemed to be getting stronger. That was the first of many terminal diagnoses to come. But he just kept improving, walking daily and keeping busy in work. As for work – the day after Ian was told he had 6 weeks to live I told the office staff, the answer came back as “Well were not working over Christmas he can” that’s help and support for you. The freighting part was that Ian did work throughout that Christmas and I went in to help. It really pissed me off, Ian had help everyone of his staff over the years and when push came to shove they basically shoved it. I had considered some of them to be friends but that ended that Christmas. The next blockbuster came in Feb 2015 when the medical team decided to do a fine needle aspiration, what we were told was that a surgical biopsy was not possible as Ian was still radioactive from therapy. Ian had the procedure which was tested there and then, out of 4 samples 3 returned as cancer active and the last was considered a false negative. Again an apology for the specialist who said that further treatment was not possible and that they couldn’t do anything more. But he kept battling on and week by week he seemed to get better and better. By November 2015 the oncologist placed Ian in partial remission (the cancer cells were still present in scans but did not appear active) WOW even been as close to Ian as I am I was gob smacked like what the fuck ? But that’s Ian for you. By Feb 2016 he was in full remission. We discussed this after meeting his oncologist and Ian said he didn’t think he was in remission he felt like it was still there, I figured that this was just Ian been over cautious and I felt confident that he was in remission. Months of waiting through more test and follow-ups and all seemed fine but Ian’s mum had taken ill and we were told she had Vascular Dementia – Ian had an amazing relationship with his Mum and this news destroyed him. I got concerned about Ian’s mental health as he started talking about death a subject that he never discussed before. So I decided to call his business partner who I had considered a friend, but I didn’t tell Ian that I made the call. He came down to meet Ian (the first time since diagnoses) and called me after the meeting to tell me that he had a good conversation with Ian and that he had offer both financial and mental help. When Ian got home after the meeting I asked him how it went and the answer “Load of crap, he said I’m going to help but I could see through it, he wants the business closed and handed over to him” two opposite stories but Ian is fantastic at reading people and he tends to be spot on, the reality was that Ian was 100% right, every agreement made at that meeting never happened actually the opposite happened as Ian had suspected.
22 years of dedicated service, drop of the hat relocations and building a business that went from 2 million to 85 million, years of helping both in business and in personal life – lost to greed and basically two faced arrogance. But what can I say ? Nothing that Ian would allow me to write here…
The business in Cork’s biggest customer was actually owned by Ian’s business partner. The credit line between the two companies was used to finance Ian’s company. I have a reason to point this out as the next set of events will show.
Ian had a meeting with his oncologist in November 2016 following a NTAP CT Scan – the oncologist was very concerned by the results because there appeared to be a large number of lymph nodes swollen but as always the underling Kidney stones took preference, the oncologist referred Ian to his urologist for urgent review however before Ian left this meeting he was told that he was no longer in full remission and the oncologist dropped the diagnoses to partial remission pending further investigation.
The urgent appointment with the Urologist happened fast and we met him within 48 hours, the Urologist looked over the report from the NTAP CT Scan and felt that the kidney looked badly damaged and he wanted to do another scan a few days later. He told Ian that he needed to bring an overnight bag with him and be prepared for a stay in hospital especially if he decided to remove Ian’s left kidney. I froze completely and left the meeting with Ian taking my car keys, he could see that I was in shock and wanted me to relax. We went for a cuppa in a local coffee shop and discussed the meeting.
Ian told me that he was not surprised at the fact that he might be facing a kidney removal, he pointed out that the years of damage caused by kidney stones could result in kidney failure. My brain freeze disappeared and I could see that Ian was okay with this but I pushed him harder and he admitted that the kidney removal was not his main concern that what looked like a relapse was more concerning. Before we left the coffee shop Ian said he was going to ring his business partner to discuss the medical issues now facing him, he asked me not to react as he wanted to use the hands free car unit, Ian has had hearing issues since he was 8 years old and his overall hearing is basically below 45% so the car kit amplifies the callers voice to a level that Ian can clearly hear.
The call was a rude awaking for me. His partners reaction was hostile, the what do you mean, I thought you said you had beaten it ? Ian stayed calm throughout the call, he said that the relapse was unexpected but not that rare, he added that he could manage the kidney issues if they decided to operate. The answer Ian got was, I need you in my office on Monday to decide what we will do with your company. As if we didn’t have enough issues facing us and but as the partners business was a controlling creditor Ian had no choice. That call was made on a Friday so we travelled to Ian’s Mums house for the weekend. We live in Cork and the meeting was in Dublin.
So off we went, I really didn’t know what would happen at the meeting, all Ian’s money was tied up with the business and outside of private health cover the past year had taken over €10,000 from our savings. Our jobs were vital to continue paying for the medical help. I was not at the meeting but Ian was not happy, his business partner instructed the immediate liquidation of the company in Cork and he would then set up a new business completely controlled by himself and another company director. I looked at Ian and asked about what we will do, Ian basically said “We are fucked they will tell us that our jobs are safe and that I will get paid compensation once the business is liquidated, which are basically lies, I need to consider what I can do but he has complete control over the business as a substantial creditor, so if he wanted he could force the liquidation anyway” I asked Ian would he consider closing the business and opening again without the business partner involved “We can’t afford to do that and I will never trust anther business partner who has a greater control in the business than I have” made a lot of sense he had just been shafted by someone he had known and trusted for over 20 years.
But we still faced the medical issues, 48 hours after that meeting all hell started breaking loose, Ian had appointed a liquidator and his business partner side kick had arrived in Cork to “oversee” the establishment of their new company. The Cork staff we not bothered as they knew they would get redundancies – I was part time and not eligible for redundancy and Ian as a director was not eligible either. Years for hard work and just like that it was gone. As this was happening Ian went to the hospital prepared for a kidney operation with a possibility of a lengthy stay in hospital. We called into the office on the way in as the new company director wanted to meet me. The meeting was to assure me that my job was safe and that I could have extra hours and time off if necessary to help Ian. When I left with Ian he said “ Don’t listen to them, they will not honor any agreement and we are basically on our own” I was in two minds about this but time would tell and yes Ian was right again, but it took 6 weeks to actually happen. Ian was able to push his concerns about business aside for the hospital appointment. The appointment started with a blood test followed by another CT Scan – then the urologist meeting. We were the first appointment following their lunch break. Ian asked me to wait outside as this meeting could include so private examinations, so I agreed. In he went and about 30 minutes later he came out smiling. The CT Scan had shown that there were no kidney stones obstructing the kidney function, the stones that remained were small enough to pass. No kidney operations needed and Ian was referred back to his Oncologist. I was surprised but over the moon with this news. On our way back to the office Ian got a call from the Oncologist to say that he had was happy with the results and that he would see Ian in 6 months, and yes he was in full remission. Now what we face is the business issues and possible unemployment.
Weeks passed fast and by Christmas Ian was no longer part of the business, I was kept on but they didn’t want me employed so they were paying me cash for 3 days work a week. I covered myself by declaring this to revenue. We had a meeting with Ian’s partners sidekick who basically guaranteed Ian and myself work after Christmas. I broke down crying during the meeting as I was emotional relieved that we had a guarantee of wages, but when we left the meeting Ian again said it was a pack of lies and we would both be unemployed by the New Year. And that is exactly what happened. Ian was told at a meeting with his previous business partner over the Christmas break that he had no further need for Ian and that was it, 22 years of helping this guy and no further need. Ian said that his business partner thought that he would relapse and would not be happy having Ian involved, but that was not actually said at the meeting. By March we were both unemployed and Ian’s next meeting was due with his oncologist, but he got a call from the Oncologist who informed Ian that his NTAP CT Scan had been reviewed by students in the US and they had pointed our that a lymph node behind Ian’s lower spine was classed as swollen, this site was never active before so it would be classed as a full relapse. However airing on the side of caution the Oncologist decided to call a biopsy and PET Scan, the biopsy had to be done by a CT Scan guided needle biopsy as the lymph node was too close to the spine to safely operate. It was a gruesome procedure and two days later another PET Scan. The following week Ian went to meet the oncologist to be told that both the biopsy and the PET Scan showed presence of active cancer cells and that Ian would have to undergo emergency treatment to stop the cancer from spreading further. The only path open was a full self donor Stem Cell Transplant. But before harvesting the stem cells he had to undergo more chemotherapy to clean his blood. This form of Chemotherapy is called ICE and the oncologist warned that it was extremely aggressive. He also told Ian to get his affairs in order as he felt that Ian might not survive the level of aggressive chemotherapy required. When Ian asked exactly what that meant the oncologist told him he may not see his next birthday 3 months later. Terminal again but this time the clock was ticking down for 12 weeks. So we now faced more chemotherapy, unemployment and then a call from Ian’s Mums doctors that she had taken a bad fall. That fall resulted in the doctors deciding that Ian’s Mum needed 27/7 medical care and could not live at home. It felt like our world was caving in, I started reading about ICE chemotherapy and every article was negative, small success rate. But somehow Ian managed it, the oncologist nicknamed Ian “A Chemo monster” somehow Ian handle extreme levels of aggress chemotherapy drugs with little serious side effects.
The ICE therapy took a few months and Ian had a successful harvest. Work or any idea of work was off the table as the focus was beating the odds medically. But the rift between Ian and his business partner deepened – Ian had heard rumors on the market place that his name was been slandered. He called his business partner to warn that he would not allow his reputation be damaged and that he needed to have these rumors stopped as they were been spread by employees in Cork. With the mountain the medical diagnoses had created Ian did not want any distractions, but his Mums medical team called him to an emergency meeting in Dublin in the home that were caring for her. Ian went up to the meeting and they were basically explaining that Ian’s mum had 6 to 8 months to live, that the condition was not improving and to be prepared for the worst. During the meeting Ian missed a call from his old office in Cork. He walked out of the meeting trying to handle the fact that his mum was terminal but returned the call to Cork. It was more crap and for the first time an open call that confirmed more rumors about Ian. He basically lost his temper and called his ex-business partner, who was away on a Cruise and couldn’t take the call but after a number of text messages Ian told him to “Go Fuck yourself sideways, stop the rumors or fact legal action” – It was Ian’s first time to threaten legal action and to be fair he wouldn’t have but the threat was enough to stop the bitching. People were pushing all the wrong buttons on Ian, he was already dealing with his own life ending prognoses and the terminal diagnoses of his Mum, seriously he was getting into a dangerous dark place, with only our support to help him, he could see the impact of the loss of his business on his personal savings.
ICE Chemotherapy 2017
Stem Cell harvest 2017
ICE Chemotherapy 2017 final cycle
BEAM Chemotherapy 2017
Stem Cell Transplant 2017
Remission 2018
Battling the unknown
My diagnosis 2020
My treatment prognosis
Hodgkin’s Lymphoma Awareness Ireland 